What’s Your Information Diet?

 

You are careful, right? Careful with what you eat and drink, which one might think of as your nutritional diet or guidelines. You care about how your body feels and functions, and you know that what you put into it matters. So, you pay attention. Most of the time, anyway, the occasional weekend lapses don’t count. After all, you’re human.

But what about your information diet*? What are the guidelines you follow to make sure that the information you process is beneficial to your mind? Your heart? Your very being? Diving headlong into social media, consuming anything and everything that pops up on your screen isn’t necessarily (or even ever) a wise choice.

You know what I’m talking about. You’re innocently scrolling through Facebook and the next thing you know, you are both fascinated and horrified by the weird things people do to their bodies, mates, pets, which gets you sucked into yet another terrifying story, and then another--you get the idea. It’s curiosity gone wild, which leaves you frozen in fear or frantic with anxiety. Not a pretty sight.

Not that Facebook or any other feed is a bad thing, far from it. You’ve just abdicated your power of choice to the algorithms that run the internet: “You interested in this? Here’s more!” When all you probably wanted to do was alleviate your temporary boredom.

Reinstate your power of choice. Be the one who determines which feeds you’re interested in, how much of each provides entertainment, useful information or relief, even when you want to indulge. Not some algorithm. It’s not always easy, however.

Deciding that you’re going to eat so many grams of protein a day, a certain amount of veggies and carbs, doesn’t mean it’s easy to follow through on your plan. It takes self-discipline, true, but aren’t the results worth it? When you step on that scale and realize 5 pounds magically (yeah, right) disappeared?

You get it. Just as with a nutritional diet, your information diet takes fortitude and willpower. Reinforce what you want in your feeds and what you want to consume. Don’t just chomp away at whatever, whenever. Remember, it’s up to you to choose.

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*A term a dear friend, Steve Cooper, shared with me recently.

Turn “Yeah, but” On Its Head, Episode 134

Why is it so difficult for people to receive your support? Why do people – friends and others – insist on arguing with you, when you know what you’re offering is really good for them? What’s with the “Yeah, but” argument? In this podcast, you’ll find out just what the “Yeah, but” syndrome is all about, turn it into a positive and give people the opportunity to really hear what you have to say.

 

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Get to the Heart of Your Apology: Speak to the Hurt! Episode 133

 

Does your partner’s refusal to accept your heartfelt apology totally irritate you? Especially when whatever they were so offended by wasn’t all your fault? How can you have a positive relationship without being perfect? In this podcast, receive helpful tips to master the magic of a complete apology, no groveling required, that your partner will accept.

 

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Let “Why?” Propel You to Greater Success

 

Remember Nike’s famous slogan “Just Do It”? Those 3 words have great validity. After all, there’s nothing to be gained by endless procrastination and avoidance. However, “Just Do It” – to be truly effective – needs to be preceded by “Why do it?”

Ah, yes, there’s the rub. Do you want a new car? “Just buy it!” is fine, but a bit of a problem if you end up either with payments you can ill afford, or a car that is a true clunker despite its shiny appearance. If, however, you sit for a moment with “Why buy it?” you may realize that what you really want is a vehicle that is easily within your monthly budget, functions as it is supposed to, and accommodates your entire team/family/dog patrol. Not just a bright shiny thing that impresses the neighbors.

Which means you’re going to have to look at how to make all those things happen before you can become the proud owner of a car that genuinely meets your needs. Most of them, anyway.

Or you’ve endlessly postponed asking your boss for that promotion, so with “Just Do It” resonating in your ears, one day you pry yourself away from your work computer and charge into their office demanding a promotion. Not a good plan. Your boss chuckles, shakes their head sadly, and says, “Whatever. I need those accounts ready by end of business day. Today.” Off you slump, depressed and disheartened.

This unfortunate state could have been prevented by simply asking yourself first: “Why ask the boss for the promotion?”  For the fatter paycheck, duh. But more likely because you feel that you deserve it, that you’ve earned it by your good work. Great, except right now you are the only one who knows that. So first, you need to figure out how to let your boss know that you deserve and have earned the promotion you want.

The important word in this particular “Why?” is “boss.” Storming into their office demanding the promotion isn’t likely to get you your promotion. Think about it. Use the experiences of your boss to strategize the best way to let them know of your deservability. What matters most to your boss? Not to you, to your boss. Then proceed accordingly.

“Just Do It” is terrific – at the right time. After you’ve answered your “Why do it?” beyond your knee-jerk “Because I want to!” Once you know your “Why,” you’ll generally find yourself able to determine your “How” to do it, which in turn will make your “Just Do It” wonderfully successful.

 

Lose the guilt ridden shoulds for the magic of could, Episode 132, Series 6

Why does it seem like there’s just too much to do, to be, to have, and all of it riddled with what you “should” do? Why can’t things just stay steady on course? Like forever? In this podcast, you’ll find out how to deal with the guilt-whip of “should” so you can open up to the new and better yet to come.

Listen to all Up! Podcasts here.

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The Big Anniversary Bash doable or not, Episode 131, Season 6

Now there’s a challenge for you. Hosting a humongous party for your partner’s parents 50^th Anniversary, to which they’ve invited every living relative, friend and assorted mates. And yet, it’s doable. In this podcast, you’ll learn a surprisingly easy process that will help you work with your partner to make this impossible party happen - without you carrying all the load. Oh happy day!

Listen to all Up! Podcasts here.

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What I Learned From A Suffering Kitten

 

A couple agreed to foster a kitten found, oddly enough, at a Lowe’s store. The kitten was in very bad shape. Along with the usual dehydration and inevitable malnourishment from having been lost or abandoned, this little ball of black fluff had no apparent use of its legs. Nonetheless, the foster couple did their best to support the kitten’s recovery, and eventually it was able to drag itself by its front legs, and finally healed to the point where it could run and play.

As I watched the very touching video of the kitten’s healing journey, I became mesmerized by what I considered the fundamental reason for its recovery. Namely, what Charles Darwin (in much more poetic terms, of course) called “adapt or die.” The kitten, at some level of its being, knew it had to adapt to its new situation – body, environment, circumstances – or die. So adapt it did. Which means, although I don’t pretend to be able to read a kitten’s mind, the kitten never looked back. Just forward. Always forward. To the next meal, the next possible step, the next moment of kindness and support. Of love.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we were so wise! We ruminate over past mistakes, over an injury, a failed relationship, endlessly. We don’t realize how harmful that is to us. You can’t move forward when you’re looking backwards. Certainly, it’s important to take a moment to assess what went wrong or awry in a given situation, but once that’s done, move on. Be like that kitten who so inspired us to ever look forward.  

Is it easy? For us, not always. Mainly because we get stuck on wanting to blame ourselves or others, rather than release and let go. What’s done truly is done; there is no undoing, but there is course correction. There is learning. There is adapting to the new situation, rather than “dying” by staying forever in the old. Letting go is a skill. It gets easier as we practice it. I have found that the more I practice letting go of the smaller disappointments and setbacks, the easier it gets to let go of bigger ones.

“Adapt or die.” Done!