I learned an amazing new technique from my massage therapist Tammy recently. No, not yet another way of ironing out my body ‘kinks,’ although she is pure genius when it comes to that. On the contrary, this had nothing to do with massage, and everything to do with life.
Ready? Here goes. Observing her dog one day, Tammy realized the profound significance of a singular command: “Drop it.” Her cute pooch immediately dropped whatever forbidden thing said puppy held tightly in its jaws. No arguing, no defensiveness, no reproach, just – dropped. Tammy started using the same technique on herself. When she had an unwanted thought or feeling, she just said “drop it” to herself.
OMG! Could it really be that easy? Yes! We are perfectly capable of obeying our commands to ourselves. We do it all day long, although often at a subconscious level: “get out of bed NOW” “brush your teeth” “be nice” “quit procrastinating” “Oh, that was stupid, how could I be so stupid?!” “Bad me!” But here’s the thing. “Drop it” requires a measure of determination and willingness few of us master as well as our dogs do...
So, easy. Yes, conceptually. The execution, however, aargh. The good news is that anything improves with practice. I’ve found that the more I use “drop it” with myself, the less likely I am to drag around some negative thought or feeling for hours (days?) on end. If nothing else, saying “drop it” to myself increases my awareness that I need to make a change, or else I’m going to keep myself in misery-land. Not my preference.
Do I mutter “I don’t wanna” to myself like a recalcitrant three-year-old
on occasion? Of course I do! And yet, more often than not, I then think of
Tammy’s wonderful life lesson from her dog, and remind myself that I too can
learn to “drop it” on command.
