You’re Not a Failure, You Just Need a Different Approach

 

                                Photo Credit: Mike Lin, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

“A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” Christopher Reeve

If ever someone was justified in describing what it takes to get through life’s most trying times, it’s surely Christopher Reeve, whose story of Superman success, accident-engendered paralysis, and a further story of creating a new and successful life for himself is well-known.

But what about you and me? Most of what we deal with in our lives is less dramatic, yet “stuff” happens to all of us. Stuff we must either rise above or sink below, and frankly, rise above seems a lot more appealing.

So what stands in the way? Why don’t we, like Reeve, find that strength to persevere? Why do we, too often, give up and simply announce, “Well, that’s life. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.” We decide we just aren’t good enough, smart enough, talented enough, whatever the “enough” is for you. We brand ourselves as a failure, and that’s that. Sigh.

But what if, bear with me here, what if it’s not about you? Sure, the “stuff” happened to you--the lost job, missed promotion, dependence on alcohol or drugs, miserable finances, partner leaving you, on and on--but that doesn’t mean you are a failure. It means you failed at something. There’s a world of difference between the two. If you failed at something, there’s always the possibility you might succeed at it eventually, or find something even more interesting to you to succeed at. Maybe not now, but sometime. With a different approach.

Ah, yes. Because that’s what generally is the problem—your current approach. If Reeve had insisted he could only be successful as an actor equipped with 4 functioning limbs, he’d never have had the life he created for himself after the accident. Instead, Reeve adopted a different approach. He used his knowledge of the acting world to become a successful director and to act in roles beyond action hero and more, using his paralysis as a plus, not a minus.

Any one of us can follow Reeve’s example. Step back from your issue, look upon it as a challenge to come up with a different approach, heck, 10 different approaches, and go for it. Persevere. Assume that you will find a more successful approach, something that allows you to go beyond your problem, or around it, under it, totally outside of it, so that you achieve success and happiness. Maybe with your original goal, maybe not. Maybe with something entirely different you would never even have considered, but for this supposed “failure.”

You are not a failure. Never were. But your approach? There are a multitude of different approaches to any difficult situation. One of them, if not many, will work for you. Just think of Reeve and--rock on!