Does your partner’s refusal to accept your heartfelt apology totally irritate you? Especially when whatever they were so offended by wasn’t all your fault? How can you have a positive relationship without being perfect? In this podcast, receive helpful tips to master the magic of a complete apology, no groveling required, that your partner will accept.
Remember Nike’s famous slogan “Just Do It”? Those 3 words have great validity. After all, there’s nothing to be gained by endless procrastination and avoidance. However, “Just Do It” – to be truly effective – needs to be preceded by “Why do it?”
Ah, yes, there’s the rub. Do you want a new car? “Just buy it!” is fine, but a bit of a problem if you end up either with payments you can ill afford, or a car that is a true clunker despite its shiny appearance. If, however, you sit for a moment with “Why buy it?” you may realize that what you really want is a vehicle that is easily within your monthly budget, functions as it is supposed to, and accommodates your entire team/family/dog patrol. Not just a bright shiny thing that impresses the neighbors.
Which means you’re going to have to look at how to make all those things happen before you can become the proud owner of a car that genuinely meets your needs. Most of them, anyway.
Or you’ve endlessly postponed asking your boss for that promotion, so with “Just Do It” resonating in your ears, one day you pry yourself away from your work computer and charge into their office demanding a promotion. Not a good plan. Your boss chuckles, shakes their head sadly, and says, “Whatever. I need those accounts ready by end of business day. Today.” Off you slump, depressed and disheartened.
This unfortunate state could have been prevented by simply asking yourself first: “Why ask the boss for the promotion?” For the fatter paycheck, duh. But more likely because you feel that you deserve it, that you’ve earned it by your good work. Great, except right now you are the only one who knows that. So first, you need to figure out how to let your boss know that you deserve and have earned the promotion you want.
The important word in this particular “Why?” is “boss.” Storming into their office demanding the promotion isn’t likely to get you your promotion. Think about it. Use the experiences of your boss to strategize the best way to let them know of your deservability. What matters most to your boss? Not to you, to your boss. Then proceed accordingly.
“Just Do It” is terrific – at
the right time. After you’ve answered your “Why do it?” beyond your knee-jerk
“Because I want to!” Once you know your “Why,” you’ll generally find yourself
able to determine your “How” to do it, which in turn will make your “Just Do It”
wonderfully successful.
Why does it seem like there’s just too much to do, to be, to have, and all of it riddled with what you “should” do? Why can’t things just stay steady on course? Like forever? In this podcast, you’ll find out how to deal with the guilt-whip of “should” so you can open up to the new and better yet to come.
Listen to all Up! Podcasts here.
Now there’s a challenge for you. Hosting a humongous party for your partner’s parents 50th Anniversary, to which they’ve invited every living relative, friend and assorted mates. And yet, it’s doable. In this podcast, you’ll learn a surprisingly easy process that will help you work with your partner to make this impossible party happen - without you carrying all the load. Oh happy day!
Listen to all Up! Podcasts here.
A couple agreed to foster a kitten found, oddly enough, at a Lowe’s store. The kitten was in very bad shape. Along with the usual dehydration and inevitable malnourishment from having been lost or abandoned, this little ball of black fluff had no apparent use of its legs. Nonetheless, the foster couple did their best to support the kitten’s recovery, and eventually it was able to drag itself by its front legs, and finally healed to the point where it could run and play.
As I watched the very touching video of the kitten’s healing journey, I became mesmerized by what I considered the fundamental reason for its recovery. Namely, what Charles Darwin (in much more poetic terms, of course) called “adapt or die.” The kitten, at some level of its being, knew it had to adapt to its new situation – body, environment, circumstances – or die. So adapt it did. Which means, although I don’t pretend to be able to read a kitten’s mind, the kitten never looked back. Just forward. Always forward. To the next meal, the next possible step, the next moment of kindness and support. Of love.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we were so wise! We ruminate over past mistakes, over an injury, a failed relationship, endlessly. We don’t realize how harmful that is to us. You can’t move forward when you’re looking backwards. Certainly, it’s important to take a moment to assess what went wrong or awry in a given situation, but once that’s done, move on. Be like that kitten who so inspired us to ever look forward.
Is it easy? For us, not always. Mainly because we get stuck on wanting to blame ourselves or others, rather than release and let go. What’s done truly is done; there is no undoing, but there is course correction. There is learning. There is adapting to the new situation, rather than “dying” by staying forever in the old. Letting go is a skill. It gets easier as we practice it. I have found that the more I practice letting go of the smaller disappointments and setbacks, the easier it gets to let go of bigger ones.
“Adapt or die.” Done!
Doesn’t it just seem sometimes like you’re never gonna get out of this rut you’re in? Much less actually enjoy your life. It doesn’t have to be that way! In this podcast, you’ll explore how to turn disaster thinking into “I can do this!” so that your life can be a whole lot more satisfying.
Listen to all Up! Podcasts here.
Ever have that feeling that you just can’t win for losing? And then dismiss it as your lot in life? Rather than respect it as pointing to a different path that may really be successful? Discover in this podcast what being an Optimist really is, and how you can use it to change your life in the best way!
Listen to all Up! Podcasts here.
As I stood in line waiting for a table last week, a couple of people were leaving the restaurant. One of them was complaining about the fo...
