Not long ago, the world waited with bated breath while
watching the rescue of 12 boys, members of the Wild Boars soccer team, and
their coach, who were caught in a flooded subterranean cave deep under the
mountains of Chang Rai, Thailand. We witnessed the extraordinary worldwide
commitment to their safe return to their families as rescue workers from different
nationalities, ethnicities and cultural backgrounds dedicated their time,
effort and means, once even at the expense of their own lives to the task at
hand. Nothing mattered other than saving these children.
We see this kind of selfless devotion to the lives of others
over and over again, during many times of crises, all over the globe. And once
the crisis has past, we sigh with relief and turn our attention back to our
ordinary lives.
But here’s the thing. If we so choose, we can infuse our
ordinary lives with some of the heroism and dedication that absorbed our minds
and hearts over the Thailand boys and their rescuers. We all face stressful challenges
in our day-to-day lives (not as stressful as what those children and their
parents went through, but stressful nonetheless). Instead of giving up, we can
step up, and be the very best of ourselves in situations that cause us unhappiness,
anger, grief or despair.
How?
1. Adopt a more compassionate response toward others and
ourselves.
None of the rescuers spent time or energy on the fact that
they were in no way related to the Thai boys, that there would be no profit in
it for them, that they had no obligation to help. The rescuers, regardless of
background or belief, simply worked together toward a common goal.
You’re having problems at work? Or with your family? With
your health? Appreciate a basic truth: everyone is simply doing the best they
can with what they’ve got from where they are. Including you. Once you accept
that, you can then forgive yourself and others for whatever pickle you/they are
in, and seek to understand the situation. Understanding what’s going on from
everyone’s point of view is what lets you effectively deal with the situation.
2. Skip right past blame and finger pointing.
The rescue workers in Thailand didn't waste time debating whose
fault the crisis was, or insist that so-and-so be blamed and raked over the
coals. They just pitched in and did what needed to
be done. In other words, they got on with the solution.
Nothing good comes out of blame or finger pointing. It’s a
giant waste of your creativity and mental capacity. Ditch it. Whatever your
specific situation, aim yourself firmly in the direction of problem-solving and
have at it. Just like the rescue workers, you’ll be much more likely to
succeed.
We are all capable of far more than we think we are. It
takes focus, a willingness to leave our egos aside, and engage our mighty
selves (yes, you are mighty!) in doing what is necessary to resolve whatever
the issue may be. It really doesn’t matter whether your personal crisis is
small (your baby is crying – again!) or large (a dreaded diagnosis), a
compassionate response, dumping blame and finger pointing and concentrating on
finding a solution will serve you exceedingly well.
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